It’s been a little over a week since Ariana Grande released her newest single thank u, next, which means it’s been a little over a week since I have listened to any song other than thank u, next. A break-up power anthem fresh off her whirlwind relationship with Pete Davidson, Grande sings about each of her past relationships, from Big Sean to Mac Miller, and what each one taught her. It got us here at MUSE thinking (and singing, and dancing), about what we learned from our exes, so we decided to pose the question to you: what are you grateful for/what did you learn from your past relationships? Our favourite answers are included below, as well as a breakup songs playlist (scroll to the end!) that we think will have you thinking thank u, next.

My ex taught me exactly who I don’t want to be and what I don’t want a relationship to look like. – 4th Year

 If someone wants to, they will. – 3rd Year

My ex taught me to find the fine balance in understanding when to give in, even when you still feel incredibly in the right, and when to stand your ground and have the patience to resolve an argument by being understood. – 1st Year

That no matter how hard you try, you can’t make someone love you. – 4th Year

Communication is both a godsend and the devil, depending on the circumstance. – 3rd Year

Not to seek value in yourself via others, because finding it in yourself is far more satisfying. – 2nd Year

To change my password more often because he used to go through my phone while I was sleeping. Trust no one. – 1st Year

I’m grateful to my ex for making me realize my self-worth. –  4th Year

If someone really loves you, they’ll stick around even when things are bad. And if they don’t, you better hit the bricks so you can stick around for yourself.  – 3rd Year

Never use a juul, vape, or anything like that. – 1st Year

British Columbia is too far away lol. – 2nd Year

Never fuck your childhood best friend. – 3rd Year

If they start ghosting you, just confront them. Bonus points if it’s in front of their new girl. Not only will you embarrass them like they embarrassed you, but you’ll also get the response you’re looking for. – 2nd Year

You can’t always be what the other person needs. –  3rd Year

He ended the relationship by saying he “couldn’t do it anymore but still wanted to be friends.” Then stopped talking to me altogether 2 months after the breakup. I never got real closure and for about a year I had really bad self-confidence because I didn’t really know why the relationship ended. It wasn’t until I opened up to a friend about the whole thing that I was told that I deserve more and better than that. So I guess I learned that in my future relationship I should ask the guy why he’s ending things, and if I get a vague answer, he wasn’t the guy for me in the first place. Additionally, I learned that I have an amazing support network of friends that I needed to let in more. – 4th Year

That having public sex is horrifying. – 2nd Year

When you don’t settle down and you keep playing around, they will move on and find someone else. Always best to follow your gut: if you want to be with them, stay. If you don’t, leave. – 3rd Year

One thing I’m grateful for is that I know now don’t need a guy to be complete! I love who I am single or taken! – 4th Year

How to give good head. – 2nd Year

If you feel like you need more, you probably need someone else. – 4th Year

I learned don’t believe everything they tell you. And also don’t lose your virginity to a guy off Tinder. – 3rd Year

Being a good person doesn’t mean they’re good for you. And likewise, they aren’t a bad person just because they’re bad for you. There can be two great people who aren’t good for each other, and that’s just the nature of relationships. – 3rd Year

My ex taught me that it’s always the quiet ones who are crazy. – 4th Year